I'm Still In Love With You
by Argentinechica94
Summary: "I guess what I'm trying to say is... I just... I miss you. And... I love you. I'm still in love with you. Honestly... I don't think I ever stopped." A short little one-shot. My version of what happened after Come What May.


**So this is just a short one-shot about what I thought could have happened after Kurt's Come What May day dream. Hope you enjoy!**

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Kurt tried to stop the tears. He really did. But who could hold in their feelings after imagining themselves singing one of the most romantic duets in history with their ex? Especially when they had discussed singing said song at their wedding. He just hoped no one would notice as he tried to discreetly wipe away a few tears. Unfortunately, he didn't have that much luck.

"Kurt, are you crying?"

"What?" Kurt gasped, avoiding eye contact with Adam, who was sitting next to him, comfortably squished into Kurt's side. Rachel, who was similarly seated on Kurt's other side, turned to stare at her best friend's face. Desperately trying to avoid this conversation, Kurt continued, "No, I'm fine, it's just- just my contacts, that's all..."

"I didn't know you wore contacts," Rachel said, confused.

"Yes, Rachel, I recently found out I have a slight astigmatism!" Kurt snapped, instantly regretting his tone. He just had a habit of snapping at people when he felt insecure or nervous.

"I would have thought you were crying because you and Blaine used to talk about how it was your dream to sing this to each other at your wedding."

Kurt turned to look at Santana as she spoke, his eyes widening, trying to plead with her to stop talking. It wasn't so much that he didn't want Adam to hear this, it was more that _he_ didn't want to hear it right now. "Did we?" he said stiffly, noticing Adam turning his head slightly to glance at Kurt.

"I remember you telling me that singing that song is a more intimate act than sex," she went on, clearly not intimidated by Kurt's glare at all.

"I'm going to get some popcorn... anyone want some?" he mumbled, scrambling to his feet and racing to the kitchen before anyone could stop him.

He made it to the kitchen and grabbed a bag of popcorn, not really wanting any but needing an excuse to be away from the others. He could hear Santana telling the other two something, but he wasn't exactly listening. As soon as he got the popcorn going, he quietly slipped out the window onto their fire escape and sat down.

Kurt couldn't believe this. Ever since the wedding, he'd found it even harder to forget about his curly haired, hazel eyed ex-boyfriend. He was constantly thinking about him, and the daydream he just had was just another addition, though it was the most vivid and emotional by far. Kurt sighed and rested his head against the cool metal of the rail next to him, staring out into the street, watching absently as cars zoomed past their apartment.

Kurt felt like he needed to talk to someone about this. He needed to let it out. But who could he talk to? Rachel wouldn't understand; not anymore. Santana would just yell at him to get his act together and just get back together with Blaine already. And Adam... no, he couldn't talk to him. They were just now getting more comfortable around each other, he couldn't just ruin their progress by bringing up his emotional struggle with Blaine.

And then it clicked. Of course! There's one person who would always listen to him and offer advice. Kurt just hoped they would pick up their phone.

Kurt listened as the dial tone rang a few times before an older, familiar voice said, _"Hello?"_

"Dad," Kurt said in relief, hoping his voice didn't give away the fact that he was still crying a bit.

_"Kurt? It sounds like you're crying. You okay, kid?"_

Taking a deep breath, Kurt said, "Yes... well, sort of, I mean... no, not really."

_"Do I have to hurt someone?"_ interrupted his dad sharply.

"No, Dad," Kurt laughed. "It's nothing like that."

_"Then what happened?"_

And with that, Kurt told Burt everything; about Adam, about what happened with Blaine on Valentine's Day, what they talked about, and finally ending with his recent dream. "... and it was so romantic, and perfect, and it seemed so real, and in the end I just reached out and hugged him really hard and it felt like home, and now I don't know what to do because Adam is sitting in the living room and -"

_"Whoa, Kurt, stop!"_ Burt cut in. _"Breathe for a second, kid, or you're going to pass out on me."_

He heard Kurt's shaky inhale and exhale through the phone and then calmly continued. _"Okay, now it's my turn to talk. You just sit there and keep breathing, okay?"_

"Okay," Kurt mumbled.

_"Now, I understand that you're confused about your feelings, but you need to stop stressing so much about it. Adam seems like a nice guy, so I'm glad you have someone like him around to make you happy. After everything that happened with Blaine a few months ago I wasn't sure how long I would have to wait to see my boy smile and be happy again. But I'm going to ask you something, and I want you to be completely honest with me. You be honest now, and you don't have to say it to anyone else, not if you don't want to. You hear me?"_

Kurt nodded slightly and whispered, "Yeah, I hear you."

_"Do you still love Blaine?"_

There it was. The dreaded question. Kurt sat there, frozen, trying to come up with a sufficient answer for his dad. "Well, I mean, I - of course I - I mean..."

_"Kurt."_

Burt heard his son sigh softly, and then silence. Guessing Kurt was still working it out in his mind, he didn't push him. After a few seconds, however, he barely caught the response that was spoken quietly into the phone.

"Yes." Kurt wiped a few stray tears off his face, sniffling softly. "Yes, Dad, I'm still completely and utterly in love with Blaine, and I don't know what to do anymore. I want to be over him, but no matter what I do, whenever I hear his name or get a text or a call or, even worse, when I see him, I just lose myself in him again."

Burt's heart broke at Kurt's anguished words. He wished he was in New York so he could pull his son into his arms and keep him from feeling like this. But he thought he knew something that would help, at least for a while. _"Well, maybe you're talking to the wrong person, then." _

Frowning, Kurt said, "What do you mean?"

_"Maybe there's someone else who should be hearing you say this. Someone who's been waiting to hear you say just that for a while now."_

Kurt stared out into the city again, lost in thought. He knew who his dad was hinting at. Burt knew him well enough to know what he needed. Honestly, Kurt knew what he should have done in the first place, but he had needed the right push that only his dad could provide. Before he could reply, Burt uttered one more thing.

_"Maybe you both need this."_

Letting out a shaky breath, Kurt nodded again. "You're right. I just need to stop avoiding this and talk to him."

_"That's my boy. I'm proud of you, Kurt."_

"Thanks, Dad," Kurt said quietly. "I love you."

_"Love you too, kid."_ And with that, he hung up.

Kurt let his arm drop down into his lap slowly. He had to do this. He needed to get it off his chest so maybe he could finally move on. But he found himself just staring at his phone, unable to move his finger to Blaine's speed dial (he hadn't changed it; he could never bring himself to). What if Blaine heard what he had to say and started begging to get back together again? Or worse... what if Blaine never wanted to talk to him again? He couldn't bear either of those.

_Snap out of it, Kurt. Just call the guy and tell him. _Taking one last deep breath, he selected Blaine's name and hit "Call".

_"Kurt?"_

Blaine answered quicker than Kurt expected, catching him off guard a bit. "H-hey, Blaine."

_"Hey,"_ Blaine said softly. _"I wasn't expecting a phone call."_

"Yeah, well, can't friends call each other?" Kurt mentally slapped himself. This was not going how he wanted it to.

_"Well, yes, but you haven't initiated a phone call between us since Thanksgiving. I think I have reason enough to be surprised."_

Kurt sighed. "Right, sorry..."

After a few uncomfortable seconds of silence, Blaine spoke again. _"So, uh... any particular reason for this call, or...?"_

"Um, yes... I have a reason." Kurt replied, shifting around nervously on the fire escape, trying to figure out how to continue from here.

_"And that reason is...?"_

"I love you."

Blaine froze on the other end, shocked at Kurt's abrupt confession. That was _not _what he was expecting to hear from his ex. Kurt, on the other hand, had literally face palmed, embarrassed by his sudden lack of filter. _"You... what?"_

Kurt sighed. No getting out of this one now. "I... I love you."

_"Yeah... I heard that the first time. But why are you telling me this?"_

"Let me start over," Kurt said. "We're currently snowed in over here. That is, me, Rachel, Santana, and... um, Adam." He heard Blaine give a small grunt of irritation but kept going. "And we were trying to decide what movie to watch, since we're clearly stuck here for a while. But Santana was obviously not going to choose something anytime soon, so I took the liberty of picking one myself. And... I chose Moulin Rouge."

A small, quiet gasp could be heard through the phone. Kurt knew what that meant. Blaine was catching on.

"So, I guess you kind of see where this is going, but please let me finish."

_"Okay."_

"Right... well I was doing okay in the beginning... until we reached Come What May. And then... I completely zoned out." Kurt could feel the tears coming back, but he pushed them away, determined to get this all out before losing control. "I imagined that you were on a New York City rooftop, in a beautiful tuxedo, complete with your signature bow tie" (Blaine snickered quietly) "and you were singing Christian's part. And, as always, you were... flawless. And then you got to the duet part, and I walked out from behind a corner, also dressed in a suit, and I strode up to you, and we were singing together, in perfect harmony. I danced with you for a moment before... before walking away, as if I was torn. But you followed me and kept singing, straight to me. Eventually, I turned to face you again and we ended the song together, inches apart. And..." Choking back a sob that was trying to escape, Kurt quietly finished. "... and I couldn't help it anymore. I pulled you closer and just allowed myself to be held by you, like we used to. And it just... it felt like home."

Finally, he let the tears fall, not really trying to control them anymore. On the other side of the phone, he could hear Blaine sniffling quietly, too. "I snapped out of it after that, and I just sat there on the couch, crying to myself."

_"Kurt..."_

"I guess what I'm trying to say is... I just... I miss you. And... I love you. I'm still in love with you. Honestly... I don't think I ever stopped."

Blaine didn't know how to respond. Honestly, he was having trouble composing himself at the moment. All he could think to say was, _"I'm still in love with you, too." _He braced himself before saying, _"I'll love you until my dying day, Kurt."_

Kurt let out a breathy laugh. He should have expected that one. "Blaine..." he whined. "I'm trying to stop crying, not cry harder."

_"Sorry," _said Blaine, sounding relieved and slightly amused. _"What did... uh, what did the others say... when you started crying..."_

Kurt knew what Blaine was really asking. He smiled. "Well... Adam noticed first. I blamed it on my contacts."

_"You wear contacts now?"_

"Nope."

_"Ah... I see."_

"Yeah, so you can see how well _that_ worked. Then Santana had to open her big mouth and mention how... how we used to talk about that being our wedding song..."

_"Oh..."_

"Yeah..." sighed Kurt. "At that point, I just had to leave the room. I didn't want... I couldn't face him, you know? But at the same time, _I _couldn't face it. And I called my dad asking for advice. Of course, you can guess what he told me."

_"So you just called me because your dad told you to?" _Blaine teased.

"No! I was planning to in the first place. I just needed my dad's gentle push."

_"Right..."_

"So, um... yeah. I just... I needed to say it to someone. And I needed you to hear it. From me."

_"Kurt... thank you. I needed to hear it."_

"Blaine," Kurt called, needing to say one last thing.

_"Yes?"_

"I didn't mean it. What I said on Valentine's Day..."

_"What..."_

"It did mean something to me. All of it. I was just too afraid to admit it."

Blaine smiled, his eyes tearing up again. _"I know, Kurt."_

"Right... well, um... yeah. I guess I'll see you sometime?"

_"Yeah, of course. You go have fun watching the rest of the movie. With Adam." _Kurt was about to interrupt, but Blaine cut him off. _"And the girls. Can't forget the girls. Because they're there, too. Watching the movie. With you... and Adam..."_

Kurt laughed. "Are you finished?"

_"Right, yeah, sorry. I'm done. You can go now. Have fun."_

"I will," Kurt said softly. "Bye, Blaine."

_"Bye, Kurt. I love you."_

"I love you, too."

Blaine grinned widely at the lack of hesitation in Kurt's voice. Feeling pretty good about himself, Blaine said one final goodbye, hung up, and threw himself backwards onto his bed, sighing happily.

In New York, Kurt was in a slightly similar situation. He had leaned back against the railing and sighed in relief, feeling better than he had before.

"Kurt?"

He jumped at the voice behind him, turning to see Adam holding up a burnt bag of popcorn. "I do love my popcorn to be nice and hot, but I think you took that a little too far..."

Laughing, Kurt got up and stepped inside, taking the bag and throwing it in the trash before grabbing another one. "Sorry, I got distracted. Do you want me to make another bag?"

"You're the one who wanted popcorn, Kurt, not me," Adam said, amused, before he got a look of concern. "Are you sure you're okay, Kurt? You look like you've been crying even more than before."

Smiling slightly, Kurt glanced at his phone. "Yeah... I'm fine now." He slipped his phone into his pocket and turned to head back to the living room, calling to Adam over his shoulder. "You coming? This movie isn't over yet."

Adam shook his head, chuckling. He knew there was something Kurt wasn't telling him, but he would ask him about it later. Right now, he would enjoy Kurt's company while he still could.

As they finished the movie, Kurt, Rachel, and Adam curled up together on the couch again, Kurt couldn't help but smile when Satine sang Come What May to Christian at the end. And this time, just a single tear rolled down his cheek. A tear of happiness.

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**AN: Review! :)**


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